Can someone tell me where or...?
l know you guys are probably sick of this but does anyone know where l can
post my writing online and get feedback? Or how about you just tell me
what you think about it here:) Here is the first chapter:)
/>Chapter One: It Has to Be Done. What makes a bath so
comforting? l ask myself as l watch the larger bubbles in the bathtub pop,
one by one. l lift my leg out of the water slowly, making note of the
pattern the bubbles take as they gently slide off of my leg. l hear the uneven clanking of feet coming closer to the door and shout out ''Just ten more minutes!'' before my father is fist could even caress the door. He grunts and then hobbles away leaving me to soak in the warm water. l sit up and pull the cork from the drain. Most of the bubbles have disappeared by now so there is no sense in lying here any longer. l slowly grab the bottle labeled Shampoo and squeeze an excessive amount of it into my hair. l run my fingers through it passively and dunk my head under the draining water. No sense in wasting what little conditioner we have left so l stand up and grab an old cotton towel from the cabinet above. After lazily wiping the excess water from my body l wrap the towel around it and examine myself in the mirror. My blue eyes look dimmer than ever against my dark brown locks but the dark circles underneath do nothing for them. It is been days since l had a decent night is sleep and I am sure l wo not be getting one tonight. l quickly dress in my night clothes and run down the stairs. Tonight is the night. refrigerator. An apple, three pieces of salami, half a wheel of cheese and half a quart of milk occupy the huge space. Before, we used to have so much food, half of it would go to spoils before the month is end. And now? We've only got enough to last us two weeks. This is not the right way to live. But what can l do? It is not like l could walk up to Commander Beent and demand him to let us have some more. I'd be dead before l even finish the first word. ''We've just got a delivery last week,'' My mother exclaimed. No one dares to go to the market unless they desperately need something, something they can not wait for the officials to gift if lucky enough. He sits silently stirring his cooling mug of tea with an expressionless face. We only ever once needed to go to the market and that resulted in the amputation of his left foot. The officials caught him and were ''kind'' enough to spare his life. Of course, not after beating him to a pulp and crushing the bones in his foot so badly my mother had no other choice but to cut it off. My mother, she is somewhat of a sorceress. If magic were real, I am sure she'd be the head of the healing department. The number of people who've passed through our house searching for cures to their problems is uncountable. ''l know,'' he replies after a few minutes of silence. His face solemn as he turns to her, ''But you know as well as l do we need to go.'' My mother is body stiffens and her anxiousness turns to being completely terrified. Her eyebrows are raised and her mouth ready to say 'no' but l interrupt. ''Tell me what to do,'' l say picking at one of the last slices of bread on the table. Truth is, I've been dying to have an adventure. ''Adel!'' My mother gasps before covering her mouth with her left hand. ''It has to be her,'' My father says, again emotionless. ''Kat is too young, Dad is handicapped and you, well, everyone needs you. I am quick, small, and almost invisible. l can do it!'' My father stood up to empty the contents of his tea cup into the sink. ''Obviously she is not ready today. We can hold out for a few more days until l train her on the basics and then, she is on her own. You're going to have to teach her everything you know about herbs and medicines.'' My mother shook her head and ran out of the kitchen. l listened to her tiny feet run up the steps around the corner and her bedroom door slam shut. No doubt she'd be the hardest one to convince and both my father and l knew it would take her some time to succumb to the suggestion. Actually, we've been training for weeks. He is been showing me how to start a small fire. How to climb trees and what spots are the best to sleep in. Showing me which berries and plants are edible and which are not. Showing me how to weave nests and baskets and make spears and fish hooks. How to find water. Showing me how to hunt. How to kill. You know, the basics.
Um.. please e-mail me more? Haha.
That was awesome! You have a great writing style and you really know how
to tell a story. I found myself accidentally skipping over sentences just
to find out what happens next.
I don't think here is the best place to post ur story. It is
better to find somewhere with people of mutual interests who are more
likely to give you constructive advice.
Start a blog. There are lots of blog groups who support & encourage one
another there.
http://nymag.com/news/media/15967/ blogger.com Other alternatives are facebook. Post ur stories in notes. I have a friend who did this all through high school & now is at University & he now writes part time for a newspaper. facebook.com Good luck.
wow really good!
I wanna read the second chapter
goodreads.com
allpoetry.com
Nice by the way, add me please. ^.^
Boring...start writing some sexy, exotic stuff. Sex acts and
s_h_i_t.
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